I know this problem can get kinda tricky. Finding faithful and godly people in general is pretty hard in itself. Luckily, scripture is loaded with encouragement and advice from people who lived hundreds and thousands of years ago who experienced the same problem you may be having :) - Finding the right man is a challenge, but there are a few things I’d like to bring up before you dive in head first. I will be breaking this up into two major points.
When I was about eight years old, I’d constantly lose my mom at the store. With my little heart pounding, I’d skim every aisle in the store. One thing that felt much better than Christmas was when I finally ran into her arms!
When you frantically search for your mom, what do you first look for? Maybe her hair, familiar face, the clothes you remember her wearing. Her stature. Maybe even her distant voice.
Same thing when you begin to find it intriguing to start looking for a man to complete your life. What do you look for? Physical traits? Spiritual traits? Or perhaps a little bit of both?
If I were to point out every detail, no such man would exist. But I do want to point out that a godly man is always after God’s own heart. I don’t mean a church boy who comes to church every Sunday, sways to the music, lifts his hands up during worship and posts how great church service was on Facebook.
A man of God is involved in prayer and will want to lead you, he’s the kind of man who’s a leader. He’ll wants to be in control. Being a leader also means that he needs to be the one pursuing you. You do not have to pursue the man. It’s in there DNA to do that job. The right guy will pursue you at the right time. And when that happens, there will be no question like, “Does he like me?” “Does he not?” The answer will be clear for you.
Relationships are a team effort. Both of you will need to be forgiving and patient. (a.k.a. Being slow to anger-James 1:19.) At some point in time, you both will get upset at each other.
A couple years ago, I saw my friends happily getting married, and it led me to believe that if my husband and I love each other, we will never argue. So it always remained a mystery to me why couples were always fighting after they got married. So as an advice, be mature enough to solve uprising problems at home first. Learn to cope with things, and then in your marriage, you’ll have an easier time to work out the issues together.
Though it’s important to pray for very specific qualities, it’s also very important to seek God first before any decision. So as a small assignment, I’d love for you to take out a journal and ask yourself, what are you looking for? In fact, write that down at the top of your page and make a nice bulleted list.
Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above Rubies. Proverbs 31:10
Here’s what’s so interesting about rubies. The word Ruby comes from the latin word Rubens which means red. In most cultures, the color red symbolizes love and friendships.
As I did some research, I found out that rubies come in different colors, but what struck me far beyond words is that anything other than the color red is no longer considered a Ruby but a Sapphire. Rubies are not just the second hardest gemstone on earth but also the rarest and ranges anywhere from $100,000 to $200,000 USD.
Scripture brings up Rubies several times when talking to ladies. And each time they call her far more precious, virtuous, beautiful, delightful and so on.
When I continued to read scripture, I slowly realized that before you even being to think about marriage, you need to understand your value first. Your worth comes from one place, and one place only.
No man can give it, no man can have it. You need to find that satisfaction in Christ. Your husband or your boyfriend can’t give you that satisfaction.
And another thing that I’ll put in bold. Don’t idolize the relationship, idolize God. This is very, very, very important.
Take this time and truly allow God to fulfill your desires. Let him be your everything. Not just in your time of crises, but in the little day to day lifestyle. Find out who you are as a woman of God.
Marriage is created by God, but you are created for God.
Another verse I really want to leave with you is, “A woman who fears the Lord, shall be praised.” Proverbs 31:30
I could go on and on about different ministries that are available for you and will give God the glory, but I won’t. I do, however, want to encourage you to pray every single day. Thank God for a beautiful morning and thank God for a beautiful night.
If you truly want to marry a godly man, you need to be a godly wife. Today. Right now. And that means to let God be your everything as a single woman of God. I wished someone had told me this sooner that I had to be godly in order to attract godly. You attract who you are. You can’t pray a one cent prayer and expect a million dollar answer. I’m afraid it doesn’t work like that.
So on a separate sheet of paper in your journal, write down, what are you doing while you’re waiting. It can be anything. Small ministries, more time with your family, or church events.
Fold the first and second paper in half and write down today’s date. In a couple years, you’d be able to look back and see what you have accomplished and how far you’ve come.
If you’re looking for a great read, check out Before You Meet Prince Charming by Sarah Mally! I’ve read this book at least three or four time and I highly recommend it! You’ll fall in love with the story and even take in a few lessons and side notes:)
Perfect book to read while you’re still single and waiting on God’s perfect timing.
You can also purchase the study guide that comes with this book by clicking here. It’s full of great questions and a perfect way to teach your daughters or even a small study group!